the dust settles in its place
in comfortable static
dynamic light flecks
all over –
Quick morning poetry practice.
I’ve been changing lately. I have imagined myself static, completed, finished growing up into the person I know myself to be. I have had myself figured out, my struggles and needs and what I know and who I am, to a point. What an arrogant mind.
I’ve been distracted lately. All-consumed by WHAT AM I GOING TO DO? WHAT DO I ACTUALLY WANT? The self-questions.
I’ve been questioning everything lately.
I’ve not been present with you lately.
I’m still starting every paragraph with that word.
I’m not finished. Growth is impossible, even when you desire it, if somehow deep down you feel that you’ve grown up.
If all Christian growth is growth downward, then what am I doing reaching and striving for that summit?
I’ve been wanting to write a blog post lately. Something sweeping and lovely about my recent thoughts. A conglomeration of things I’ve read and seen and learned and gained and done and what’s going on in my life that’s new and interesting and exciting. But not today, maybe.
Maybe today we should just realize that the sky is so blue and smile because it’s a change from the gray that can sink into our cracks and turn us noir. Maybe today we should read and memorize Bible verses. Believe that stress is overrated. That prayer is powerful. That people care about you. That everything you do matters, but it doesn’t matter THAT much. It’s not the end of the world. I’m going to go and have a day. But first, here are some verses that I’m planning to memorize (I don’t really do that, but I know it will be valuable and help redirect my thoughts when I’m not thinking straight.), in case you want to pick one up, and because I hope they encourage.
“Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.”
“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death.”
“Be not rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be hasty to utter a word before God, for God is in heaven and you are on earth. Therefore let your words be few. For a dream comes with much business and a fool’s voice with many words.”
“Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself to the point of death, even death on a cross.”
(from a Christmas break trip to Texas, taken by my dear friend Andrea)